Early morning again wtf?

HEY!!!
Good morning, everyone. I'm up a little earlier than I'd really intended to be, which sucks. Yesterday was such a fucking long day, I hate my new work schedule. I don't mean to complain, sorry. I have to say again that I'm jealous of Jack, getting to do what he loves for a living. He's really good and totally deserves this, but another part of me is so jealous it almost physically hurts. He said he was working

 on some more music yesterday, he just never stops. ^_~ I can't wait to hear and watch him play again. I do a lot of writing, but I don't really know what it amounts to in the end. I admire his dedication to what he does, believe me. I had to laugh that we both started to complain about how much a lot of current music sucks. I made the joke that I was glad to have grown up when I did, because at least I had good music to listen to as a kid, and he laughed. It was so awesome to have him agree with me, and actually have him laugh at one of my shitty jokes. I miss him again already. I so regret not telling him I love him sooner, I feel so stupid. I shouldn't  have been so afraid, even though I still feel I had good reason to be. I didn't try to make him understand that other guys had hurt me really badly in the past, and now I'm terrified of being hurt again. It's not that I don't think he could understand, I just wasn't sure if he'd even want listen. I just feel (again) that he's too good for me. I know I shouldn't dwell on past bad experiences, but it's hard to let things like this go, especially when I know these guys have no remorse for how they treated me and how bad they made me feel. Okay, onto a different subject. Cory and I talked again yesterday, and he's doing really well and seems happier than he's been in quite some time. I can't tell you how happy that makes me. He's happy and healthy again, and nothing else matters. I think that's about it for today. Thanks a lot for reading.
Today's song is "Blind" by Korn
BYE!!!!