Day off.........yay!!!!!!!

HEY!!!

I'm going to enjoy today as much as possible, because my dad's more than likely going to be here in a few days. I won't be able to blog much, or see my friends. God, I probably won't even be able to talk on Facebook very much. I'm not saying I don't want him here, per se, but I'm saying I find it very hard to let certain aspects of my personality out around him. For instance, this whole gothy witch thing I do. I actually cast a protection spell on my place this morning. It just requires some white candles and incense. I used dragon's blood, because it works really well and it smells good. Today's my day off from my nurse/maid gig, too, thankfully. I don't entirely miss it. I wonde what my dad would think if he saw how I really am, and not the girl I think I have to be when he's around. I think he'll probably be here by the time I get home from work on Monday, and I really hope it works out. I wonder what he'd think if he saw Mike and Jack, and how much I've come to like being around them. I wonder too, what THEY would think of my nurse/maid gig. I got a little message from Mike on Facebook this morning saying he thought it was me on the bus a few days ago, but that I've changed up my look a little, so he wasn't sure it was me. I checked for his tattoos, and didn't see them. How could we have missed each other? He was also saying one of his best friends is moving away today, and he's having a really hard time of it. I tried to be encouraging and sypmathtic. I told him about Becky moving to Texas and how sad I was because of it. I wonder if I actually made him feel better, I hope so. I've changed up my look a little today, too. I've still got my black nails, but I'm not wearing much foundation or eye make-up. It's way easier this way, believe me. I kind of wonder if I look better like this. I kind of love not having to care so much about how I look. I went down to the store this morning, and didn't think I should go totally without make-up. It's kind of lame though, right, to put make-up on to go to the store? I used a little black eye shadow as eye-liner, and it actually works pretty well. I just don't feel as pretty or secure without the make-up. That's kind of why I identify so much with Ami Mizuno and Aya Hoshino; they're both really pretty, smart, and cool, but they're SO insecure about themselves. I guess that's it for right now. I didn't really have a lot to say, but I wanted to get back on here one more time while I'm sure I still can without interuptions. Thanks so much for reading. I'm going to do my best to keep this up.

Today's song is "Amon" by Dir en grey

BYE!!!!!!!!!

Dir en grey binge on my lunch break

HEY!!!!!!!!

I just bought the new Dir en grey album, Dum Spiro Spero, and it rocks so far. I'm amazed at how quickly I came to like them this much. The bitch of living in a fairly small city and loving a band from another country is you really have to search for their cds sometimes. I caught myself worrying about my relationships again, and had to remind myself that I'm doing that for no real reason. I'm a reassurance hog, and I need to stop that before it actually creates a problem. I know that really I'm okay with everyone, I just overthink everything and worry too much. If I'm not told everyday that I'm loved I freak, you know? I caught Mark and Cory talking about me; and Cory goes "Yeah, but she overthinks EVERYTHING." Cory tends to do this himself, so I don't really take that as an insult. Besides, he's right. I need to calm down and relax. It's just so much easier said than done. I know that the more I worry and ask for reassurance, the more likely I am to drive those I want reassurance from away. My mom's best friend even recommended taking stress reducing medicine; I hope I'm not bad enough that I need to be medicated, for shit's sake. It makes me question whether my job choice was really a good idea, because it totally just adds to my stress. It's not always easy being a nurse/maid. If I didn't know that I was actually helping people by sticking it out with this job, and if it wouldn't be insanely hard to find another one, maybe I would quit. That's what makes me so glad to have the people I have, I couldn't do this without them. I find myself really missing Jack right now. I especially love it when he smiles. I want to talk to him, but I don't want to seem like I'm pushing my presence on him, or like I'm trying to get his attention. Besides, I know I already have his attention and need to take it easy. The problem is, we tend to both pretend like we're not really trying in this relationship, or friendship, or whatever the hell it even is. I want to get closer to him, but not by seeming too desperate. I'm glad for the new Dir en grey album, that way I stop listening to his band's. I just don't want to seem like some desperate, stupid bimbo hanger-on who's only talking to him because he's in a band and will more than likely be famous one day. Granted, I didn't even know the band existed until about 4 months ago, but I still don't want him thinking I'm THAT kind of girl. I think whatever bond we have is deeper than that, but I'd like to make sure. The bond that Chris and I have is almost ideal, but that's because I never felt for him what I feel for Jack. With Chris and I, it's defintely a mental/ emotional thing. I'd like my friendship with Mike to develop the same way. ^_^ I guess that's it for today. Thanks again for reading. Please keep it up.

Today's song is "Akatsuki" by Die en grey ^_^ ^_^ ^_^ ^_^

BYE!!!!!!!!!!

Lunch time again

HEY!!

I'm back again. I don't have a lot to talk about except that I'm really glad I told my mom's friend off. He actually came to see me at her place yesterday, and I just told him the truth. I wish it were always that easy for me to get my points across to others. I worry sometimes that I withhold too much from others, and that makes them think I don't care as much as I do. I have to be careful sometimes not to say too much, at the same time. Is there anything in life that isn't a balancing act anymore? I worry that I'm a little too pushy and possessive when I really care about someone, and that I'm too overprotective. Take Cory, for example. The last time I saw him he was telling me how tired he was and how hard he'd been working; I told him to go home and get some sleep immediately. I think I'm kind of maternal when it comes to him, and he hates it. Well, I did the same thing with Jack the last time I talked to him, telling him "I remember being glad you didn't get hurt." I just have a crazy protective streak, I can't help it. I'm snacking on rice crackers and green tea right now and cranking Dir en grey. God, to be Japanese. I was cranking Nirvana on my way to work this morning. I took the bus, since I loathe driving. I swear, I thought Mike was sitting a few seats away from me. I almost tapped this guy who looks so much like him on the shoulder and said "Hey", until I saw that this guy had no tattoos. Mike has one on the inside of his right arm. There aren't THAT many skinny red haired guys hanging around here, you know? I felt kind of stupid for doing that. I'm glad I stopped before making a total ass of myself, but then I started wishing that had been him, and we could have at least talked for a few minutes. I smiled to hear his and Jack's voices waking me up this morning, I just let the song play and thought "Good morning, boys." The novelty of the fact that these guys are my friends has yet to wear off. I got teased about Jack again yesterday, but by Mom. I don't really bother to defend our friendship anymore, I don't feel the need. It's not that I feel I shouldn't defend it, but all we do is talk and encourage each other, so there's nothing TO defend. God, it feels good to sit here. I wish I could say I feel totally secure in all my relationships, but I don't. I worry that I either give too much or that I don't give enough. I'd just like to know when I give enough, you know? I feel sometimes like I try too hard and people don't like that. I tend to forget that not everyone is as obvious as I think I am. I wonder if I really am as obvious as I think I am, because Jack wouldn't have brought up that bit about falling off the stage again if he really knew what I was thinking. I wonder why he thought I'd want to hear about him getting even mildly hurt. It wasn't the whole "Chicks dig scars" theory, I hope. This particular chick DOES NOT dig scars. I'm just glad it wasn't worse than a few bruises and scratches. It wasn't the first time he'd kind of bragged about his capacity to endure pain, I asked him if it hurt a lot when he got his tattoos, and he said ;"The one on my inner arm didn't hurt at all, 'cause it's not a sensitive area, I did feel some pain with the one on my foot, but not too much." I have to give him credit for at least having the guts to go get the tattoos, which I don't. I kind of admire the guts that he, Mike, and Cassie have. They've all gone after what they want and are all very close to it. I think that's all about my family, friends, and I for right now. I did want to comment on something that happened a little while ago, but I kept skipping over. The West Mephis 3 have finally been relased, I almost didn't believe it when I read it. I'm really glad, they aren't the murderers people were led to believe they were. I almost didn't think it would happen, especially after 18 years. I think that's really it for right now. Thanks for reading, and I'll be back as soon as I can.

Today's song is "The final" by Dir en grey

BYE!!!!!!!!

Stone Sour binge on my lunch break

HEY!!!!!!

Here I am again, eating and typing. I'm also listening to Stone Sour's Rock in Rio concert. Oh, my God!!!!! I still love Corey's voice, I can't help it. I think it's funny how it doesn't seem like they have to clean up his vocals on the albums very much. He's just that awesome at what he does. ^_~ This also helps relieve some of the stress of my maid/nurse gig. I really like "Say you'll haunt me" off their latest album. I like the chorus. I've been thinking about the relationships in my life again, and I wonder at how they all go on simultaneously. I'm surprised too, at all the little bobbles I keep and wear as a sign that in a way, I belong to the ones I got them from. The rings and bracelet I got from my mom, the watch from dad, the keychains from Mark and Cassie, and the bracelet supporting Jack and Mike's band. I proudly brand myself as theirs, but then I wonder if they brand themselves as mine. It's not necessarily that I'm feeling insecure again, believe me, if they're still putting up with my shit, they're not going anywhere anytime soon. I just wonder if I'm influencing them as much as they influence me. I also really hope I mean as much to them as they do to me. It's so fun to listen to Stone Sour, I haven't in a little while. "Bother" is still my favorite song in the entire fucking world. I was actually just asked about my bracelet supporting Jack and Mike's band at work, and told the old man who asked me that 2 of my friends are in a band, and I wear it to support them. Plus, it's blue which is my favorite color. I hate working for this guy, though. I like his wife, but he's an asshole. He's one of the 60 something guys hitting on his 2o something caretaker, see? I DO NOT want to go back there today, but I can't really just leave. >_> His wife is mentally handicapped and diabetic, so it's mostly for her that I'm there. It feels good to just sit here for right now. I got done helping cook lunch, clean up the kitchen, then making sure her blood-sugar levels don't spike after she eats. Yeah, I'm going to need a few more run throughs of "Bother" to cheer up. I also found out (via my mom) that one of her friends wants to date me. He's got to be at least 45, and is a total creep. Trevor is bad enough, I don't need some other freak bothering me. Okay, maybe I should try not to think about him. I'm focusing instead upon the beauty and awesomenesss of Corey's voice. About that guy, he's been a friend of my mom's for a few months, and I didn't think he really knew who I even was. There's no way in hell I'm dating him, obviously. I worry about the difference in age between Jack and I, but this is ridiculous. I'm going to tell him to go to hell, too. I guess that's it for today, I need to get going.

Today's song is "Bother" by Stone Sour

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Back again, YAY!!!!

HEY!!!!!!!!!

I'm back for a bit. I was thinking about how lucky I am again just a bit ago. I have a lot to be thankful for, though I'm not always properly grateful. I was also thinking about how weird things are sometimes, for example how Jack accepted my Facebook friend request within a few hours, and one of my cousins and one of my mom's best friends, who's sort of like a cool older aunt to me, didn't accept my friend requests at all. I mean, he's a friend now, but he was just some guy I didn't know until about a year ago, whereas I've known these other people for years. I was kind of afraid he wouldn't accept the friend request, and then it would be very awkward the next time I saw him. I'm incredibly glad he did, because it really would have hurt my feelings if he hadn't. I was telling him how listening to his music helps me to relax and cheer up after doing my nurse/maid thing at work all day. He grinned and thanked me. I think that cheered him up, too. I like that there is this bit of reciprocity in our friendship. Of course, it wouldn't really be a friendship without it. I find it funny how people can surprise you, I didn't expect to like him this much or have him like me at all. This just happened because we happened to be in the same place at the same time, and have some things in common. I think it's strange almost, how quickly he went from a total stranger to a friend. I was kind of proud of myself for having the guts to talk to him at all at first. I know that I still tend to spaz out around him, especially when he plays, but he doesn't seem to mind that I'm a spaz. He also doesn't seem to mind that I'm not rail-thin or that I'm a total geek. What's not great about that? I'm just glad to be feeling happy. Of course, I haven't really brought up anything specific about our friendship, but that's because it only makes people tease me. Also, it's no one else's business. I'm lucky enough to have all these people in my life, and I'm working hard at keeping them there. I kind of put not only my life on display here, but the lives of almost everyone in my life, so I have to be respectful of them, and extra loving to those I talk about here most. I hope they don't mind. I love them, but believe me at times, I need a place to vent about them. I'm still playing trip-planner. I've figured out that the road we want to take into Canada might be closed by the time we want to leave. Damn!! I think we might end up having to post-pone the trip yet again. Mom told me about a decently priced trip to London this Fall, which sounds good, but I need to check it out more carefully. I'd really rather go back to Japan, though, to be honest. San Fransisco would be good, too. I might get to go watch Jack and Mike play again, after all. They had to change the date, and I'd LOVE to go. I'd laugh my ass off if Mike really does go to that show in a mini-skirt. He'd do it, too. It wouldn't be the first time he's shown up on stage wearing something weird. I guess that's it for today. Thanks for reading.

Today's song is "Funeral for yesterday" by Kittie

BYE!!!!!!!!!!

Playing trip planner.....

HEY!!

Here I am again at the computer. I'm on lunch break right now, and wanted to take a break from trip planning, too. I figured out that if we don't go to Canada soon, we might not get the chance until next Summer. I'm hoping we can still make this work. I'm hoping I can find a decent (and affordable) hotel in San Fransisco, too. I won't have much else to do but plan these trips this weekend, because Jack and Mike are going to be out on tour with some of their friends. In a way, maybe it's better to spend a few days not seeing or talking to them. It's almost crazy how quickly our lives have become intertwined. Of course, there's still Facebook. I can always talk to them that way. It's funny how my heart pounded when I sent Jack the friend request, I felt almost as nervous as if I'd asked him out or something. I actually had to psych myself up so I'd have the nerve to just do it. I just kept thinking "Don't let him reject me." I should try not to think or talk about him too much. I WILL try, I promise. I took one last really nice swim yesterday, it was amazing. I love it when it's still nice and warm, and the water's clear and sparkly but the Summer crowds are gone from the pool. This is pretty much the only time of year when the pool is actually peaceful. I sit here, eating a veggie burger and drinking Coke Zero, and wishing I could just sit and write all day. Okay, maybe I should write a bit more about these trips I'm planning. We want to go to Waterton National Park, and maybe Glacer National Park, too. I want to see Japantown in San Franciso, and Goldengate Park and Goldengate Bridge. Of course, I'd go to Chinatown, too. I'd want to go to the Asian Art Museum in San Franciso, and maybe actually stay in Japantown if I could find a decently priced hotel. So far, these are the only ideas I have, and I'm working from there. I'd better get going. Thanks for reading.

Today's song is "Fade to black" by Metallica

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!

Had too much to think

HEY!!!!!!!

I was getting ready this morning, and thinking about what Jack told Mike about me. I still almost can't believe those words came out of his mouth. I know I've done a lot to "improve" myself over the years, but that doesn't mean I don't still have body image issues. Once a geeky fat girl, always a geeky fat girl, you know? I'm still a total geek, believe me. Just one look through my faovite tv shows and movies will convinvce you of that. I was looking at myself pretty critically in the mirror this morning, and just trying to figure out what it is he thinks is so "pretty" about me. I'm of course too chicken shit to ask him in person, and I don't think Mike would be happy if he found out that I told Jack he told me what he said about me. I'm probably over thinking all of this, I tend to do that with everything. It turns out I've lost yet another 1/2 pound. Today's my day off, so I went clothes shopping this morning, and didn't totally hate it. I do think I'm a bit oddly proportioned, though. I'm built sort of like Barbie, or would be if I were taller. I'm not complaining, it just makes it more of a challenge to find well fitting clothes sometimes. I know I have nothing to complain about, so I won't. We're finally going to Canada in October, we had to change the date since my mom and I had to work and my dad's not here yet. He won't be here until about the second weekend of October. I'm hoping we won't freeze our asses off up there, and it'll be a fun trip. I'm also hoping to(finally) go to San Francisco in either late March or early April. I think it'd be kind of fun to spend my birthday in San Francisco, if I can manage it at all. I'd try to go when it's the least expensive. I need to start figuring all this out now, to make sure that I'm well prepared. I guess that's it for right now. Thanks for reading.

Today's song is "Nothing else matters" by Metallica

BYE!!!!!!!

It's impossible to tell what goes on inside boys' heads

HEY!!!!!!

What's up, everyone? Still have some free time, though this is technically my lunch break. It's nicee to just sit in front of the computer for a while. I'm here to bitch (just a bit) about my job. The best way to descibe what I do is to say that I'm somewhere between a nurse and a maid for the people I take care of. I don't mind, but I do feel sometimes like I'm underappreciated. It's not easy putting up with the shit these people give me. I was telling one of the old ladies about Jack and Mike and all the drama because of them, and she asked me "Are you sure you're not throwing your life away for those boys, honey?" I just shook my head, I didn't feel like explaining about it anymore. I tend to get defensive, and I didn't think that was a good idea. Speaking of "those boys", though. I saw Jack, and all I got when he saw me was a "Hey, what's up?" after not seeing me face to face for about 2 1/2 weeks. I told him again how much fun I had at their show, and he laughed and said "Remember when I fell off the stage?" I said "I remember being glad you didn't get hurt." He said "I banged up my leg and my knee, but it's not bad." The idiot was almost proud he got hurt. Rememeber I told you I couldn't help thinking "Oh my God, you guys are stupid" when Mike was half hanging out the car window, waving at me? Same feeling. I just don't get that. I also kind of asked Mike (finally) why he wants to be friends, and almost couldn't belive his answer. He said "Well, my friend Jack told me about this really pretty, nice, funny girl named Angela. He said you were one of our first fans, and that you're pretty cool." Yet, he couldn't say this to my face why? Whatever, I know I should happy, but it bugs me. Hence the title of today's entry. It's from the last book I read called "The Strawmen", it also happens to be totally true. I guess that's it for right now. I just had to let that out. Thanks for reading.

Today's song is " Welcome home(sanitarium)" by Metallica.

BYE!!!!!!!!

People, wtf?

HEY!!!!

My dad's not here, so I have a bit of time to sit and write again. In a way, I have to admit that I'm kind of glad he couldn't make it this weekend. I almost wish Cassie hadn't made it. >_> She and I were fine, at first. As I was making up the extra bed for her, though, she started bragging about how she had tickets to see Seether. She said it was really hard finding someone else who liked them, and only one of her friends does. Who the hell do you think introduced her to them in the fucking first place, though? This girl right here. She didn't deign to ask me, and that both hurt me and pissed me off. I thought we were past all this petty little crap, and then she pulls this. She knew I would've wanted to go, too, damn it. Thankfully, I held it in and didn't let on how bad she made me feel. She treated me like shit for years, and I really thought we'd moved on. Okay, I need to calm down. Thank God, I have other people. Becky said "You should go take some time for yourself, you deserve that. Get out of the house, hang out with Melody. She'd love to see you." Melody is another friend of mine who just recently moved back here. I needed that, trust me. I also wanted to write about the most incredibly weird dream I had 2 nights ago. I was asking Jack and Mike all these questions about our friendship; what we are to each other, what we're doing together, and what we're going to be to each other later on. It was so surreal, yet it felt like they were right in front of me. I wish that this had been more than just my subconscious reflecting my waking mind's insecurities and answered my questions, though. Either that, or I wish I had the fucking guts to ask these questions in reality. >_>I really miss Chris right now. After one of the worst fights Cassie and I ever had, he started teasing me like he normally would, until he saw that I'd been crying. He asked what was wrong, I poured my heart out to him, we hugged, and I felt so much better. I need that right now. I'd better get going for today. Thanks for reading.

Today's song is "Numb" by Linkin Park

BYE!!!!!!

I'm back, baby!

HEY!!!!!!!!

It actually almost feels like I just woke up and started my day. Sadly, that's definitely not the case. I've been up for 6 hours already. At least I slept a bit more and a bit better last night. I found something interesting out about Mike yesterday, though. I got a few friend suggestions on Facebook, from him, and it seems he has a definite type. He seems to be into short, slender brunettes with a bit of an attitude, and a taste for his kind of music. Ring any bells? I don't know if I should bring this up or not, but it does bother me a little. It seems I passed the appearance test. In a way I'm almost glad my intuition wasn't totally off base, but I hate to think that this is the only reason he's bothering with me. I know that I have a type myself; dark haired, dark eyed pretty boys seem to get every time. Ironically, he's a red head who's even paler than I am. Guess who fits my type? ^_~ Mike's been a total gentleman so far, so he's okay, but I am going to be careful. In a way I expected this; after all I am kind of playing into to the worst aspects of the whole "rocker girl" thing, and that's what he's responding to. I seriously wish I knew what in fucking hell Jack told him about me. In a way, this image is useful; as a member of a rather important minority, I can kind of pull rank and tell these guys what to do, and they'll do it 9 times out of 10. It's a game that requires delicacy,though, because they can't get the wrong idea about me. They probably already have, though. But it's this kind of shit that led Mike to half hang himself out the window of a moving car to get my attention. It's kind of funny, even with Mark and Danny, I can totally tell them what to do. I don't necessarily enjoy that, and I don't intentionally screw with them, it just happens. I may have the whole image of the "rocker/goth girl" going on, but that's only because it's the only way I feel comfortable, plus I dig the music. I'm not a slut, or a drunk, so I don't play into it that way. In a way, I do it a bit ironically. I've always been the smart-ass, tough-talking, but together girl who's smarter than most of the people she hangs out with. I hated all the pressure put on me in school, and this became a form of rebellion against all the ridiculously high expectations I had heaped upon me. Cassie's going to be here tonight. I'm glad. I miss my sis. ~_^ I hope she'll have fun here. I wish we could go swimming, but it's too cold. I'll think of something. ^_^ Mark was giving me shit again about Jack yesterday, asking how my "rock star future husband" is. I don't know why he enjoys giving me shit about him, but he does. All this shit that I was thinking about with Mike stirred up some of the suspicions and doubts I had before. I was wondering if I didn't work for hours on my appearance before going out if I'd be worthy of the attention of guys like Jack and Mike, or if they'd even give me the time of day. Also, it seems I've lost another 5 pounds, my shoulders are starting to look kind of bony, and I don't like that. But again; I ask how much of me are they even seeing? I know I responded to Jack's physical beauty first I admit it, but I came to like how sweet and funny he is, plus he can be a total dork, and I love that. I won't be telling Dad anything about him, Mike, or Trevor. I hate that he treats me like an idiot or a little girl. I can't help but wonder if he'd treat me differently if I'd been a boy. I love being a woman, don't get me wrong, but I deserve the same God damn respect he gives Danny. I guess that's it for right now. Thanks for letting me get all this off my chest. I'll be here to update this as much as possible.

Today's song is " Killing in the name of" by Rage against the machine LOVE the chorus! ^_~

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Still tired, but better

HEY!!!!

I'm still dead tired, but I managed to sleep a good 5 1/2 hours last night, which (pathetically) is an improvement. I'm in a slightly better mood, too. Thank God for coffee. It started raining at about 4:30 this morning, I rolled over and shut the window over my bed, and went back to sleep for about another hour. Nothing else Trevor related has happened, and I'm really glad. Mom and Mark came over yesterday, in an effort to cheer me up and calm me down. Unfortunately, all they did was argue. I got so frazzled by their stupid ass bickering that I almost asked them to just go home. I hate it when they do that, and they do it a lot. I hate it even more when they try and drag me into it. I got a message on Facebook yesterday from my friend Becky, the one who moved to Texas, complaining that she never gets to talk to me anymore. I wrote about my dad coming up soon, and how I'm still in the same city we grew up in, sadly. I also talked to Danielle, Jack's boss, for a bit today. She's so cool. I came in, and she goes "Hey, girl! What's up?" I love coming in there and being greeted like a friend. I'm still a bit puzzled by Mike wanting to be friends with me. I know Jack told him about me, but I wonder what in hell he told him. I'm not looking a gift horse in the mouth here, but I do think I deserve to know what was said about me while I was the topic of their conversation. Also, it's probably weird that I have no qualms about being friends with Mike, whereas every instinct I had told me to stay away from Trevor. It was good knowing that he was a friend of a friend, and I was willing to trust him because of that. I just knew Trevor would be jealous of guys like that. I got to talk to my best friend yesterday, and she said her soon to be ex isn't paying child support like he's supposed to, and is being really selfish when it comes to spending time with their little girl. Things haven't exactly been easy for her either, obviously. I'm hoping her ex will quit being such an asshole soon. I'm looking forward to seeing Cassie tomorrow. I think we're going to have a Fruits Basket or Supergals marathon. I love that we're friends now!!!!!

I wonder how she's dealing with Frank's death, she's coming down here to go to his funeral early Saturday morning. I hope she'll be okay. She's a tough girl, but this still has to be pretty damn devastating. On another, totally different topic, I've been feeling a little overwhelmed by all the relationship shit that's been going on lately, all the different relationships I have and have either recently formed (Mike) or reestablished (Rob). It's a lot to take, especially with the added craziness of my family. I want all these complicated, stress-inducing relationships though, I don't exactly feel good about how easy it would be for me to just eventually shut myself off from everyone. I cut myelf off from others way too much as it is. Isn't this picture way cute? It fits too, since Cassie and I are both small like that. She also has black hair, while I have brown. I'm hoping things will only get better between us, but we both have to keep working on it. I guess that's it for today, thanks for reading.

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!