I'm sitting here, wishing Jack were here. It sucks just as much as I predicted it would, and he's going to be gone for weeks. Maybe I'm not really cut out for this, after all. I hate being away from him, yet it doesn't seem to bother him that I'm away from him. In fact knowing him, he's probably hitting on every girl he can. It seems more and more like even if he and I were together, it wouldn't work out. He definitely wouldn't be the monogamous, loving boyfriend I'd want. I had trouble sleeping last night, and got up after tossing and turning for over an hour. I ended up watching all the episodes of Supernatural I'd saved up on my dvr. I have to admit, it was awesome. Still, it would have been more awesome to have Jack around, or to at least be talking to him. I have to say it's not exactly the same, watching gorgeous guys as it would be having one with you, or at least on the phone. I'd love to say the way those two look has nothing to do with why I love this series so much, but that would totally be a lie. Anyway, I got to sleep eventually, though I didn't sleep nearly enough. It's ridiculous that I couldn't sleep because I was thinking about Jack and worrying about him, right? He doesn't want me to, he hates it when people get too clingy, but here I am. The reason I was worrying was that they ended up sleeping in their fucking van, 5 guys cramped into a van with all their gear, clothes, booze, and food. I just somehow think that's a bad idea, you know? I guess they couldn't find any affordable hotel rooms, so that's what they did. I'm acting overly protective again, damn it. I'm glad it was all right and everything, but still, that seems like a bad idea. I think I need to switch subjects now. Mom will be home in 9 days. I think she's actually looking forward to being home, I guess she missed it. Of course, she also missed us. In a way, I think Mark would rather stay with me. I guess Mom's a lot more strict. I'm not too laid back, as you can tell. I just don't want to start getting all knit picky over stupid shit that doesn't matter, so I try to just focus on what does matter. I also think Mark likes it that I know all about the games and anime he likes and can talk with him about it, and mom can't do that. I think mom dislikes that I'm closer to Mark in a lot of ways than she is. What can I say? He and I have more in common. Mark said how much he misses her, so it's not like he doesn't love her. I guess that's really it for right now. Today's song is "Mourning Sun" by Fields of the Nephilim
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