Sad

HEY!!! 

I'm sorry I haven't been here in a couple days. I've been fairly busy, as I said I'd be. I'm feeling kind of sad right now because Jack hasn't invited me to his band's next show, and I REALLY want to go. Not that I need an invitation, but it'd be nice to know he wanted me there. I sound really pathetic, bitching like a high school girl whose crush won't invite her to the dance. I had another really weird moment with Mike this morning, where he expressed thoughts and feelings I'd had in exactly the same way I would. The fact that I felt weird about it must have shown up on my face too, Mike noticed it. It was a lot easier before these feelings crept up on me. The reason I hadn't heard from Jack in a while is that they've been busy and are about ready to record 4 more songs. According to Jack, the sooner they're in the recording studio the better. I know it's partly my own God damn fault for brushing Jack off almost every time he's asked me to go to a show, and I hate myself for it. I also brushed Sarah off again after she invited me to a party. I hate so much that my job and my family have taken over what's supposed to be my life. I also feel a little resentful of the fact that I'm spending what are supposed to be some of the best years of my life taking care of other people while what little social life I have atrophies because I'm left without the time or energy to maintain it. I want so much to see Jack again. I hope I don't sound selfish saying this, but it's true. I know I said before that I wasn't sure how I was going to juggle my job, my friends, and my family; I just basically cut friends out of the equation.>_> I can't really even blame Jack for this, I'd quit asking after being turned down 7 times in a row, too. I need to go do something else, this is too depressing. It doesn't help that I bought their EP exactly a year ago today, and have hardly taken it out of my cd player. I'll be back here as often as possible.
Today's song is "A Devil for me" by Black Veil Brides

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!