SO sad.....

HEY!!!

I'd like to say WOW to the over 9,000 pageviews I've gotten here, and thank you. At the same time, I'm really sad. Jack's officially quit his job to play guitar full time. It's great for him, and I'm really happy for him, but I'm also really going to fucking miss seeing him at work. I feel again like I have nothing to offer him, and that I'd probably just be holding him back if we were together. I know I've helped him (in a tiny way) to get to this point, and I'm glad, but God damn, I'm afraid we won't get to see each other at all anymore. He was asking who all would want to come to their next show, saying "I wanna see all of you there!!" Of course, I want to go. It's on Valentine's Day, which is officially my least favorite day of the year. Even if it is mom's birthday. At least we've got Facebook, but it's not the same. He was ranting at some girl who'd apparently hurt one of his friends, I don't like seeing that side of him and didn't really know he had it in him. Okay, I'm going to start crying now. I should try and think of something else to talk about. I got asked (again) why I'm not married yesterday, and got so angry. It's not like it's every woman's grand ambition in life to get married and have kids, fyi. I didn't even know this guy's name, he was some friend of mom's that I'd never met before. I just don't get how he thinks he has any right to be telling me how to live, you know? I don't even know how the hell he knew who I was. That kind of ruined yesterday for me, and what Jack said this morning ruined today for me. Here's hoping tomorrow will be better, I guess. I know he's not my only friend who's moved on to something better, but I feel it all the more because he was so blase' about it. I also feel it more with him because of how he makes me feel about him, and how I wish he felt the same. This is why I'm not married, every time I even like a guy, it goes to hell. Okay, I don't want to just sit here, moping. I can't, I have to get going to work soon. I wish now I had the time to call one of my friends and talk about this. I wish I'd had the guts to tell Jack how I felt about him sooner, and I know that it does me no good to sit here wishing. Okay, maybe I need to wrap this up. I'll be back tomorrow. I hope with some good news. Thanks again for reading, everyone. Today's song is "People=Shit" by Slipknot

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!