Man, I'm still so fucking tired. I actually even got to sleep in a little this morning.You know how they say the anticipation of something is sometimes better than the thing itself? That's a load of bullshit. I wish Jack's show were tonight, I've waited long enough to see him. I told him I was coming and he got all excited and happy. I think he just wants anyone to come, he doesn't really care who.
Granted, I was happy he asked me, but I still don't know how much it meant. I ran into Craig at the record store again yesterday, it was kind of awkward. I think he still thinks there's a chance for us to get together, and there isn't. I wish he wouldn't try to ask me out every time he sees me when I've told him in no uncertain terms that I don't reciprocate his feelings. I don't know what to do about this guy. Even Jack doesn't scare him off. I fucking knew I shouldn't have said a word to him, just like with Trevor. I hope it doesn't end as disastrously as it did with Trevor. I'm feeling kind of sick, I think I'm getting an ear infection of something. But I'm going to this fucking show if it kills me, believe me. I was looking at the list of people Jack and Mike invited to their show and they seem to have had a very strict "No fat chicks" rule when they sent out invitations. Not to mention, they invited about 50 guys and 300 girls. I hate to say this, but their motivations are really no different from Craig's, they're just better looking so they get away with it. >_> Admittedly, I'm just as guilty of letting them get away with it as all these other girls. I'm just as easily swayed by a pair of pretty faces, trust me. It's not just their pretty faces, though that's what I noticed first. I love it when they're vulnerable like when Jack talks about his nightmares or being afraid of thunder-storms and losing his grandpa and when Mike told me he cried when one of his best friends moved away. I don't get a lot of that with Craig, he doesn't usually talk about anything but wanting to go out. I've known Jack and Mike longer, and I know them better. I trust them though their intentions are probably dubious, as weird as that might sound. I guess that's about it for right now.
Today's song is " The Beautiful People" by Marylin Manson
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