I'm still not entirely sure what's going on with Sandra, her older brother said he goes to see her every day and there isn't much change. That's all I know, my friends. I guess it covers the relevant points well enough, but it's still frustrating to sit here and do nothing. I heard from Jack and Mike again; God damn it, they're funny. I know this doesn't really help answer all my questions about our relationship (such as it is), but it did cheer me up a bit. I'm very glad I had them to cheer me up at least, believe me. I think I can always count on them for that, and I'm grateful. I needed cheering up for another reason too, I'm afraid; my dad called again. It seems he really wants to at least try to work things out, but I think it's just because he wants a place to crash when he gets here that he won't have to pay for. I just don't trust him or believe much of anything he says, I can't help it. What am I supposed to do when he's done nothing but disappoint and hurt me my entire life? I don't know if he'll ever just want to be there for me as a father should or if it's just convenient because I'm a grown woman with her shit (mostly) together who can take care of him. I was thinking it over a lot yesterday, and I'm fairly sure I can't trust him and he just wants me to take care of him. I know that technically it would be the right thing to do to let some shit go at least and take care of him, even though he never took care of me. I just don't know if I have it in me to be forgiving of so much and take care of someone who's never been there for me when I needed him. Do I owe him anything? I'm really conflicted. I guess that that's really all there is for today. Thanks so much for reading, I love you guys.
Today's song is "Fade to black" by Metallica ^_^
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