HEY!!!!!!Our "little"
Christmas party went pretty well, and yesterday was actually quite fun. Cory, Mark, Cassie, and I went to a movie. I'm definitely not used to being in a house full of people anymore, I actually got tired out. I've come to like my peace and quiet even more. I mostly got clothes and little things, but that's not such a bad thing. I kind of needed them. I'm trying not to think about Jack, and I haven't seen him in a few days. I miss him, but then I ask myself why I do. I kind of doubt he's missing me, so why put myself through that? I have to say, I'm glad I'm at least asking myself these questions. I also have to say that I had a lot of fun just hanging out with Cassie the first night she stayed over. She actually started doing my hair and we chatted for about an hour. There's a guy she really likes, but he's her boss's son, so it's kind of complicated. I think that's at least a little less complicated than Jack and I. I'm still trying to decide if I want to keep tagging along and trying to pretend that his indifference doesn't hurt me. I really don't know what to do here. I can't deny my happiness when he so much as smiles at me, let alone when he speaks to me. I can't and won't subsist on such a minimum of attention though, I deserve better than that. But by the same token, I can't command him to feel something that he doesn't just because it's what I want. I saw Craig and that other guy whom I think is the one who wrote about me in the local paper today, within about half an hour of each other. I consciously avoided the second guy, but couldn't talk to Craig. I was going into a store, and he was having his clothes rung up at the register. I felt horrible, he was kind of looking at me like "Come over here." He seems to actually be really sweet, I probably was a little harsh with him. I still don't want to give up on the kind of guy I want, even if said guy isn't Jack. I guess that's it for right now. Thanks to my followers, and everyone who reads this. ^_^
Christmas party went pretty well, and yesterday was actually quite fun. Cory, Mark, Cassie, and I went to a movie. I'm definitely not used to being in a house full of people anymore, I actually got tired out. I've come to like my peace and quiet even more. I mostly got clothes and little things, but that's not such a bad thing. I kind of needed them. I'm trying not to think about Jack, and I haven't seen him in a few days. I miss him, but then I ask myself why I do. I kind of doubt he's missing me, so why put myself through that? I have to say, I'm glad I'm at least asking myself these questions. I also have to say that I had a lot of fun just hanging out with Cassie the first night she stayed over. She actually started doing my hair and we chatted for about an hour. There's a guy she really likes, but he's her boss's son, so it's kind of complicated. I think that's at least a little less complicated than Jack and I. I'm still trying to decide if I want to keep tagging along and trying to pretend that his indifference doesn't hurt me. I really don't know what to do here. I can't deny my happiness when he so much as smiles at me, let alone when he speaks to me. I can't and won't subsist on such a minimum of attention though, I deserve better than that. But by the same token, I can't command him to feel something that he doesn't just because it's what I want. I saw Craig and that other guy whom I think is the one who wrote about me in the local paper today, within about half an hour of each other. I consciously avoided the second guy, but couldn't talk to Craig. I was going into a store, and he was having his clothes rung up at the register. I felt horrible, he was kind of looking at me like "Come over here." He seems to actually be really sweet, I probably was a little harsh with him. I still don't want to give up on the kind of guy I want, even if said guy isn't Jack. I guess that's it for right now. Thanks to my followers, and everyone who reads this. ^_^ 
Today's song is " Capital G" by Nine Inch Nails
BYE!!!!!!!
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