HEY!!!!!!
I'm fairly sure I've used this picture before, but this is kind of how I look right now, but with a shitload more hair. ^_~ I'm kind of feeling sorry for Jack right now, he seemed really lonely and kind of sad. If I thought he'd let me, I would've hugged him. He was going on about how he wishes he had someone to make feel special. How does he not know how special he makes me feel just by talking to me and spending time with me? He knows I want to be the one he makes feel special, too. God damn it, I want to forgive him again. I fully realize that would be stupid, but come on. I probably should have told him he makes me feel special just by being here, but of course I couldn't because I suck. Am I stupid for feeling bad for him? I was all set to give him a piece of my mind about how ignored he makes me feel sometimes, then he says this and all the anger and frustration I'd felt totally gave way to pity and love for him. If he'd smiled at me, I totally would've forgiven him then and there. Son of a bitch!!! I do love him. This has to be one of the weirdest, most amazingly messed up relationships ever. This kind of proves that I can't entirely cut him out though, doesn't it? Well, shit. Do we just keep muddling through life together like this, then? I guess, for now. He was also saying he can't wait to play again, and I have to admit I can't wait to wat
ch him play again. I love his band, there's no doubt about that. I love that I get to watch them pull themselves up by their bootstraps too, it's kind of cool. It does pose a problem if I ever do cut him out, we have mutual friends now and that would further complicate this mess. I hate how easily he can still put a smile on my face. Okay, I have got to get him off my mind for now. I tried on the new jeans I got from Cassie for Christmas, and am so proud that my jeans size is almost the same as my shoe size. I think they look pretty good, but furthermore, I feel good in them. I definitely still have my insecurities, but I really should be proud of all the progress I've made. It's tough not to feel bad about myself when I'm constantly bombarded with all these stupid, unrealistic, and unhealthy images of what I'm "supposed" to look like. I'm not quite to the point where I can say "fuck that", but I'm getting there. I hope to get there soon. I guess I should be happy with who I am, but I know my flaws and weanesses better than anyone, and I see them so much better. I guess I should wrap this up. I'm really grateful for all of you readers and my 2 followers. I'll be back tomorrow, at some point.
ch him play again. I love his band, there's no doubt about that. I love that I get to watch them pull themselves up by their bootstraps too, it's kind of cool. It does pose a problem if I ever do cut him out, we have mutual friends now and that would further complicate this mess. I hate how easily he can still put a smile on my face. Okay, I have got to get him off my mind for now. I tried on the new jeans I got from Cassie for Christmas, and am so proud that my jeans size is almost the same as my shoe size. I think they look pretty good, but furthermore, I feel good in them. I definitely still have my insecurities, but I really should be proud of all the progress I've made. It's tough not to feel bad about myself when I'm constantly bombarded with all these stupid, unrealistic, and unhealthy images of what I'm "supposed" to look like. I'm not quite to the point where I can say "fuck that", but I'm getting there. I hope to get there soon. I guess I should be happy with who I am, but I know my flaws and weanesses better than anyone, and I see them so much better. I guess I should wrap this up. I'm really grateful for all of you readers and my 2 followers. I'll be back tomorrow, at some point. 
Today's song is "Marked" by Bad Religion
BYE!!!!!!!!
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