My plague

HEY!!!!!

I feel a little better today than I have in a while, but i still feel like I'm wading through all kinds of shit that I shouldn't have to. It's been crazy stressful dealing with both my parents being in the same place again. I swear, it seems like they can't say anything really nice to each other anymore. I'm usually stuck playing the mediator, too, you know? I'm supposed to be their kid, and I'm watching out for THEM. I saw Jack just a bit ago, it was ridiculous how happy I felt. He saw me and waved and smiled, and my stupid heart skipped a beat. Obviously, I'm still stuck on him. He said he almost didn't get the day off for their next show, when I apologized for declining his invitation. I thought that was kind of funny. I hate how he can still affect me like that. I saw Craig again today, too. It's kind of funny how he and Jack both smiled, waved, and asked how I was in the exact same order. I still don't know what (if anything) I really am to Jack, and I can't stand it. We were having a good time talking, though, and I didn't want to spoil it. I'm incredibly grateful to Mark, Danny, Jack, and my best friend for keeping me calm and happy lately. I love them all, in different ways. I've lost another 2 1/2 pounds, which means all together I've lost almost 70 pounds. That's a hell of a lot of fat, believe me. I guess other than the usual insecurities about Jack, and wanting to bitch my parents out for putting me in the middle of THEIR problems, I'm okay. I guess that's it for right now. Thanks a lot for reading.

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today's song is "Vanitas" by Dir En Grey ^_^