Gaming with my girls, friends, and being tired

 HEY!!!
I've been spending a lot more time with friends lately,and it's been great. I've come to realize that I can't spend so much time alone, especially with people clamoring for my attention. I played games for hours last night with Angela and my cousin, Julia. It's a little tricky organizing these gaming sessions considering Julia lives in Austria and we have to connect over XBOX LIVE to play together, but she's so much fun to talk to. I would be the girl on the left, Angela the girl in the middle, and Julia the girl on the right. I'm just glad her English is good enough she and Angela can talk to each other, too. It's kind of funny that Julia and I didn't get along at first, she used to make fun of me for being fat.  She and I have come to know, love, and respect each other over time, and are really good friends now. I guess it helps that I've lost a lot of weight, but I think she's just gotten to know me and doesn't care so much what I look like anymore. It helps that we're also into anime and the same kind of music. Believe me, it's amazing to have female friends to share this shit with, and I'm grateful for it every day. I find it funny that my friend Lynn thinks I'm an influence on other people, particularly the  girls, because they often end up listening to what I listen to or wearing what I wear. I ask again; When the fuck did it become cool to be like me? Part of the reason I'm actively seeking out friendship is Jack, I haven't heard from him in a week now and he and his girlfriend are going to be on vacation together starting today. I miss him, and feel like I'm about to be cut out of his life entirely. I guess I'm trying to prepare myself for when it happens. I'm so jealous it hurts and I want to cry though, if I'm honest. I don't know why I still care so much, How can he have caused me so much pain and I still love him so much? I guess I'm trying to get over him, but judging by the stabs of pain in my heart when I think about him, I'm not even close to being there yet. I know I've said this before, but I think it's best to let him go. I know I said I wanted to be in his life, but I've been thinking and it's just too hard. I'm pretty tired as a result of gaming last night, but it was worth it. I felt so shitty at first and didn't want to complain about my problems, but it helped to talk to Angela and Julia. I'm so glad they're my friends, and almost like my sisters. I love Cassie, but she won't game with me. She and are going to see "Deadpool" and "The Suicide Squad" together though, and it's going to be great. I love my fellow geek girls. I think that's about it for right now. Thank you for reading, love you guys.
Today's song is " Wait and Bleed" by Slipknot
BYE!!!