Leaving soon ..

HEY!!!!!!!!

 

After this, I really need to get my shit together and head over to Mom's house. As this will be the last time I have to myself for a while, however, I'm going to write here. I want to do so much traveling next year, but don't know if I can afford to take the time off or if I really want to spend what it would cost to go everywhere I want to go. My aunt and grandma have been practically begging for us to come see them, and Mark and Mom have been talking about going to check out London and Paris from there. I also want at least to go back to Tokyo, though I'd love to see Kyoto again, too. Part of me feels like I'm pathetic for just working all the time and having little else in my life, and that's why I feel like I need to do this. It's also partially because of Jack, I hate that I won't be able to see him whenever I want to anymore. You might say I'm trying to get away from him. He and the guys are probably going to move now that they've got their record deal, and I feel like I should do something different,too. I sound kind of ridiculous, don't I? I miss the shit out of him. I hate that I waited so long to finally come clean with him about my feelings, I should have been brave for once in my fucking life and told him how I felt. I regret that so much, but there's nothing I can do about it now. I LOVE HIM!!!! I still owe him for unintentionally scaring off Trevor, too. ^_~ The truth is, when Cassie and I were in Japan, I was trying to get away from him, too. I liked him but didn't think he'd ever like me, so I didn't say anything. I've lived like this for too long, and it's painful. He's moving on, and I need to, also. I hate looking like this every time I see or even hear from him. It's unfair to me, and something of an annoyance to him, I'm sure. I guess that's really it for right now. Thanks for reading, love you guys. ^_^ 
Today's song is "Thank you for the venom" by My Chemical Romance

BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!