HEY!! Thank you for reading my last two posts, they were difficult to write. I'm trying to act like nothing is wrong, but doubt it's very convincing. I have to figure out what to do next, and I wish it weren't so. I'm going to miss him for a long time. After Rob rejected me and left it took me two years to get back to normal, and five years after what Camron did to me. I don't want to give so much time to hurting and feeling like shit again. That's what bothers me, though_ two guys fucked me up fairly badly for seven years. Most of the time I spent with Jack was happy and I just wish things had ended differently. I don't know how to let go just yet, my heart still belongs to him if I'm honest. I know I told him to leave, and ultimately it was the right thing to do, but that doesn't mean it was easy. I know I take things very seriously and getting rejected shouldn't be a big deal but it is for me. I'm not the kind of girl who falls in and out of love like it's nothing. I wanted to give my heart to him and have his in return. I hate the idea of them being so happy and know it's wrong. Mike just texted me to ask how I'm doing, and I don't want to lie to him. I could say at least I'm not crying anymore. I think maybe I should answer him, but pull my punches a bit. I want to remain his friend, and hope it's not too awkward between us. I think that's it for now.
No comments:
Post a Comment