This love....

HEY!!!!!!

I didn't get to see Jack today, unfortunately. I should have figured that he wouldn't be there this morning when I went to pick up my ticket, since he said he'd be working the late shift at work yesterday. In a way, I was almost glad he wasn't there, my heart was in my throat until I walked in and saw Danielle, his boss, there. I was kind of disappointed at the same time, though, since I'd worked hard to look as pretty as I possibly can. I guess I'll just have to keep trying to find him. I wonder if Danielle knew I came there looking for Jack. I had Mom and Mark over for dinner yesterday, and Mom noticed that I'd flat-ironed my hair, which is quite a feat since it's about 2 1/2 feet long at this point. She even asked if I were going on a date, which I thought was ridiculous, since the one guy I want to date in this whole stupid city hasn't asked me out, and I haven't had the guts to ask him yet. About my hair, I'm thinking of getting it cut, so it would look something like the girl's in the picture up there. She kind of dresses like me too, come to think of it. I might dye it black again, though. ^_^I want to think that my family (meaning Mom and Mark at this point) doesn't know something's up with Jack and I, but they probably do. I have an overwhelming urge to keep them from him, I kind of feel like I should protect him from them. I'm sorry they know he even exists right now, I'm terrified enough of driving him off on my own, I DON'T need them to do it for me. When you're the daughter of a crazy, over-protective family like I am, you learn pretty quickly that mum is the word when it comes to any guy you like at all, believe me. I'm still dying to go see Jack's band play, I'll have to rescind that comment I made yesterday about only skanks getting invited to hang with him though, if he asks me, since I'm not one. ^_~ God, I hope he asks me, and I don't have to kind of lead him up to it. I'm trying not to think about the pounding my heart will be doing when I get to see him again. It's so lame that I wasn't this scared of going to Japan, or singing in front of other people, yet this TERRIFIES me. I saw a little video they uploaded to their facebook page, it looks like they had a really good time at Warped Tour. I've got 5 of the 7 songs on their EP on my i POD now, this scream Jack gives at the beginning of the 7th is amazing, quite frankly. I'm wondering what my parents would think if they knew THIS was the guy "their little girl's" heart officially belongs to. Yeah, it's not pretty. Even Mark was saying something about protecting me from him, then I had to tell him something like "Whatever, I started talking to him." See what I mean when I call my family "crazy and over-protective"? Beyond that, though, they're pretty great. I don't think I'm going to be doing anything this Summer beyond going to check out Jack's mad guitar skills live, hopefully do some swimming, and maybe start singing again. It kind of sucks that so much of what I like to listen to and sing is so totally out of my natural range, though. I'm a mezzo-soprano naturally, and since most of what I like is sung by guys, that means working with at least a tenor range, which I've tried to reach, and can't. I do a decent Amy Lee impression, and I can sort of imitate Lacey Mosley from Flyleaf, but there are far too few female Metal singers. Another thing that kind of sucks ass about being a female Metal fan, is that the guys expect a lot of you, appearance wise. It takes me at least 2 hours every morning to get ready. I hate that I have to put myself throught so much shit every day just to feel like I'm pretty enough for Jack. >_> I guess that's it for today. I'll write about whatever might happen with Jack as soon as it might happen. If there's any justice in the world, it'll go well. Thanks for reading.

Today's song is "Fully alive" by Flyleaf. Kind of have to rep a female Metal singer after what I just said. ^_~ Plus, her voice rules.

BYE!!!